Happy Monday! Hope this cheers you up! 😀 “Sorry, your password has been in use for 90 days and has expired – you must register a new one”. roses “Sorry, too few characters.” pretty roses “Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character.” 1 pretty rose “Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces.” 1prettyrose “Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters.” 1fuckingprettyrose “Sorry,… [Continue Reading...]

A Frugal Businessman

Recently read it, have to “save” it. ****************** A businessman walked into a bank in New York City and asked to see the loan officer. He told the loan officer that he was going out of town for two weeks and needed a $5,000 loan.The loan officer told the business man that there had to be some type of insurance on the loan. One option… [Continue Reading...]

Dear Tech Support

INSTALLING HUSBAND Dear Tech Support , Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1..0, and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as: · Romance 9.5 and · Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as… [Continue Reading...]

Letter to IRS on April 15th

Dear IRS, I am sorry to inform you that I will not be able to pay taxes owed April 15, but all is not lost. I have paid these taxes: accounts receivable tax, building permit tax, CDL tax, cigarette tax, corporate income tax, dog license tax, federal income tax, unemployment tax, gasoline tax, hunting license tax, fishing license tax, waterfowl stamp tax, inheritance tax, inventory… [Continue Reading...]

Community Service

One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asks about his bill and the barber replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The florist is pleased and leaves the shop. When the barber goes to open his shop the next morning there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting… [Continue Reading...]